i skinned my knee.

obviously, i want to wish all my chinese friends / readers , a great chinese new year!

smiles to all of you! =]

well wishes from me to all of you.

and im kinda bored at home.

cant go anywhere because everywhere also closed.

damn sian. so here i am at home la.

and i slept like at 11pm yesterday.

i got nth else to do. everyone's out anyway.

wanted to watch fireworks at chinatown.

but squeezing around would end up disastrous.

since im already bored.

im gonna bore you guys with more boredome alright?

im gonna like fill you people about my army life so far!

how about that! (get your popcorn ready!)

on a second thought.

im lazy to say much la.

i've climbed the rank ladder fast.

i was like the LPS ( Leader Platoon Sergeant ) for 5 days. - before field camp.

and was the LSC ( Leader Section Commander ) for 2 days - during grandslam ( 2nd field camp )

and was promoted to LPS again. for a day and a half.

and promoted to LSM ( Leader Sergeant Major ) before booking out.

how can i not feel everyone breathing at my neck now that im the company in-charge?

i cant take the stress on more.

i thought i can take up the challenge.

but now i rather take a step back and slow down.

i want to relax. and not have ppl tie-ing me down to the floor.

everything seem different.

i cant read you no longer.

you seem distant.

i wished everything was the way it was.

i've cleared HEROES SEASON 3.

went for some retail therapy.

made me smile a little.

i laughed a little.

though everytime i wanted to see you.

things just didnt go my way.

im about to just give up.

and vanished myself into thin air.

memories just linger. up there.

i was never a player in love.

and never will.

not even once.

Labels: random stories.

yeah. im done with all my field camps.

and its been damn shagging. and im going to have a break till tuesday la.

everyone smile for afizzul please. =]

i deserve this rest. i really deserve it. and the lastest news would be,

I MIGHT BE CROSSING

OVER TO OCS TO BE

AN OFFICER.

another big smile maybe. doubts.

Labels: cleared.

i need a good snuggle and make myself comfortable. just like always.

Labels: huggles and xoxo

yoohoo. =]

im back from the first field camp.

damn shagged.

and the best of all, the confinement given to me because....

i didnt ensure the rubbish was cleared before moving to the field camp. CB!

and why the fuck i got confined? because i was the Platoon Sergeant.

the person who runs the platoon.

fuck la. im home alr. did alot of work in camp. clean here and there.

washed all my uniform and everything using the washing machine! thank god.

i would have died. SERIOUSLY in CAPS. haha.

and my dear ipod nano died on me. and i was fucking bored.

and here's another piece of good news, my next fieldcamp is this tuesday!

god is really blessing me! (*sarcasm)

a change takes sometime, but an action takes seconds.

Labels: fieldcamp-nia.

if i said i didnt miss you, i lied badly.

Labels: lies.

i never took notice of this song till now.

Rihanna - Rehab

Baby, baby

When we first met

I never felt something so strong

You were like my lover

And my best friend

All wrapped into one

With a ribbon on it

And all of a sudden

You went, left

I didn't know how to follow

It's like a shot

That spun me around

And now my heart left

I feel so empty and hollow

And I'll never give myself to another

The way I gave it to you

Don't even recognize

The ways you hurt me

Do you?

It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back

And you're the one to blame

And now I feel like, oh

You're the reason

Why I'm thinking

I don't wanna smoke on

These cigarettes no more

I guess that's what I get

For wishful thinking

I should've never let you enter my door

Next time you wanna go on and leave

I should just let you go on and do it

Cause now I'm using like I believe

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

Damn,

Ain't it crazy when you're love swept?

You'll do anything for the one you love

'Cause anytime that you needed me

I'd be there

It's like you were my favorite drug

The only problem is

That you was using me

In a different way that I was using you

But now that I know, it's not meant to be

You gotta go, I gotta win myself off of you

And I'll never give myself to another

The way I gave it to you

Don't even recognize

The ways you hurt me

Do you?

It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back

And you're the one to blame

And now I feel like, oh

You're the reason

Why I'm thinking

I don't wanna smoke on

These cigarettes no more

I guess that's what I get

For wishful thinking

I should've never let you enter my door

Next time you wanna go on and leave

I should just let you go on and do it

Cause now I'm using like I believe

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

You're the reason

Why I'm thinking

I don't wanna smoke on

These cigarettes no more

I guess that's what I get

For wishful thinking

I should've never let you enter my door

Next time you wanna go on and leave

I should just let you go on and do it

Cause now I'm using I believe

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

It's like I checked into rehab and

Baby, you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

I gotta check into rehab

'Cause baby you're my disease

Labels: i need to go on a rehab soon.

i didnt notice so much.

time really flied passed.

and the fact that it has been near to 2 weeks since new year.

i let everything go.

whatever i held close to my heart.

learning to let go was difficult but i need to learn right.

someone told me when you love/like someone too much,

the only way is to hate the person.

i used to hate due to something but the point that i rather not hate the person is another.

the point that the person is important.

how important can a person get other than your family members right?

what if i said equivalent?

the fact that im taking a step back,

because i dont even know what im doing.

and i cant read your next move.

talking about hate, i dislike this bastard.

because i dislike him for what he's done.

and act as if nothing happened.

NABEI. condemned by me. isnt that good afterall huh?

Labels: you know who you are.

5 days in camp without booking out = lethargicness.

and of course not thinking of some other stuff.

thus, to be honest, im tired.

i've not been having enough rest like totally.

been sleeping at 1am each day and waking up at 5am.

falling in and doing 10 over different exercises plus a 3km run every morning.

sounds good doesnt it.

and because of this disorder to my body, i flunked IPPT.

but my 2.4km timing improved to 9.12 mins. =]

damn happy.

field camp next week.

grandslam next next week.

that equals to suicidal. SERIOUSLY.

but for the 3SG rank, i'll try to endure with pride.

i hope you're doing fine.

after that night and what happened, i hope nothing changed.

nothing changed till something said right?

Labels: my sacrifice.

i've never been this true to anyone before,

the fact that i thought i will be able to see you again.

im neither here nor there.

thou' im being true to myself.

smile. because i still do.

Labels: you.

this post is dedicated to all my friends in my life.

whether they have made a difference in my life or not.

they are the special people for me and always be.

for my ups and downs.

for my sadness and my laughters.

i take this opportunity to thank you.

jiawei, jorge, frankie, garry, andrew, leo, august, jolene, melisa, louis lye, louis sim, stely, jarrod, ernest, marcus, adam, messiah, xiaowei and kingone.

i made new friends in 2008 and i do hope in 2009,

things will never change among us.

my section mates in ulysses.

my platoon mates in ulysses.

and my company mates in ulysses.

thou' i really miss my sec school friends, i do miss my poly friends too.

this year didnt end on a good note for me.

thanks to jolene, she came all the way down to just spend the last few minutes of

the new year's eve with me. thanks girl.

and i met up with melisa. thanks to you too.

im tired of playing the hot and cold.

im really tired.

i hope 2009 would be a great year.

though i feel somehow insignificant now.

im in pieces now. the stars would guide me for now.

booking in later.

and booking out on friday night.

for now, i wish you readers happy new year! =]

and to you, all the best.

Labels: happy new year.