i skinned my knee.

once again.
i felt numb.
been waking up at 5am to wake YOU up.
haha. (:

HURT
Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you but I know you won't be there

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hating you
Somedays I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes and see you looking back

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself
If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that
I've missed you since you've been away

Oh, it's dangerous
So I'm afraid to try and turn back time

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything
I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself

By hurting you

its just a rant. (:
i love you loads.
you-know-who-you-are!

Labels: hurt, loved, numb, YOU

im seriously happy with what i have now.
(:
im in need of squashing.
anyone wanna play against me?
(:
oh! u need an insurance u know.
yuting says i play very dangerously in court.
HEH. so any takers?

sat&sun.
sitting in my room.
look out the window.
thinking of you.
wondering whether you thought of me too.

remembered the hikki?

Labels: squash, YOU

saying "i love you", can make a whole difference.
does it?

i gave up on love last year. after HER.
YOU made me feel love again. (:
maybe feeling INSECURE was normal.
at least thats what i thought.

life was already mundane before YOU entered.
maybe LOVE was suppose to hurt.

things that YOU say do scare me sometimes.
i think i think too much and have little faith in you.
but what im scared of is what i think will happen on of the days.
it nvr occured to me before to have my other have to cheat on me before.

i was talking to one of my lesbian friend.
this is the scenario she gave me,
lets have A and B.
A is the butch.
and B is the chio girl.

A asked B, "will you cheat me behind my back?"
B replied, "i know you wont because you can control yourself, but i think
i cant control myself"
A replied, "then whats the point of continuing?"

long pause.
arkward situation.

is it because B doesnt love A as much already?
its not fair when A can control herself while B cant?
the feeling in A was painful.

was reading my friends blog,
and this is what HE wrote,
Today, I want to talk about the inherently vulgar four-letter word which can make or break all the lonely souls out there: l-o-v-e. Yes, it's the time of the year again when foolish people fall in love and get their hearts broken, be it by someone new or by someone they'd least expect. Forget all the "power of love" and the "love will keep us together"; it's all bullshit.

Here's what love really is. It's physical attraction with a dash of lust, a pinch of blindness, stirred within a concoction of confusion and never-ending doubts. That's love. And that's why love is very dangerous. Take it the right way and you'll live long enough to feel the pleasures it can bring; Take it the wrong way and you're on a one way trip to your personal hell.

okok. enough about love!

today went out with deon after he finshed sch.
went to buy his crumpler bag.
ate fish and co.
and off home we went.
(:
and we were cam-whoring in the train can?
lol. like what joanna and daven say, im a WHORE.
ahahahahahaha.

thanks to joanna and daven to be my pillar of support for me.
i really appreciated it.
especially to daven who hear me talk my hearts out.
thanks alot. (:

Labels: deon, hurt, insecure, loved

its been a long time i had a very long update right?
then its time for my update eh? haha.

been squashing at Singapore Polytechnic together with
FMSS ( Fairfield Methodist Secondary School).
its been rather fun la.
those kids so cute. the guys most of them are in sec1&sec2.
not bad players!
will play with you guys again!

well. i didnt really elaborate on what has been going on with me.
its been pretty boring la.
life been kinda sucky to me.

come to think of it, i've not been to SENTOSA or to the ZOO for a freaking long time.
haha. and it seem like all my friends are busy with their own life.

louis lye yong seng! time for you to jio me out already lei.
haha. had a good chat with you yesterday!
we have alot of things to catch up!
time does zoom by and things do change hor.
(: bro! im always there for you!

oh ya! i went back to my secondary sch for the sec1 camp
if some of you are not informed la.
yaya. like i said in my previous post.
IT WAS WONDERFULLY BORING!
lol.
but i had fun at night la.
laughing here and there.
ready laugh until stomachache.
although the fun was there,
my mind was there thinking about YOU!

laughter seem to occupy me la.
i love to laugh!
retards and association co. also like dead already.
i can hear no more laughter.

went to johore, catched a movie, and stayed-over!
fun and laughters all the way!

been doing YOUR work for YOU!
my hands are aching from all those cutting and drawing!
and i did most of the work while 1% was done by mummy.
LOL.
really can laugh out load!
its already completed for YOU!
thank me pls!
haha. i deserve more than a thank rights!

i wanna go shop but no capital.
wtf right?
i hate those feeling when u like something so much and you can buy them!
my bad!
afizzul! why didnt you work!? u lazy bumb!
yayaya. blame myself for it!

i let the pictures do the talking ok?

Labels: camp, FMSS, laughters, LIFE, sentosa, YOU, zoo

well. time has moved.
im well aware of things around me.

sec 1 camp was wonderfully boring.
haha.
but nevertheless, we had fun laughing our heads off.
(:

i miss you badly.
i need you by my side.

sch holidays are boring.
im not working.

2mths soon! (:
love you loads.

Labels: boredome, camp, loved

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

wow. thats like super true can. LOL.
long time didnt update.
im fine and running.
my dear friend, Chu Wei Xin, leaving for the US.
LOL. take kaire hor.

"CUM" WEI CHN, happy 19th Birthday. LOL.